OceanSide church of Christ

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F.A.M.I.L.Y.

Victor M. Eskew

 

INTRODUCTION

 

A.     God ordained marriage, the home, and the family.

God ordained marriage, the home, and the family.

 

B.      We emphasize this because the society in which we live is straying so far away from what God ordained.

 

C.     It is essential for Christians to establish godly homes. 

Once those homes are established, they need to be maintained.

We MUST be the ones to show the world what a real home, a God-ordained home, is.

 

I.                    A FOUNDATION ON SCRIPTURE

 

A.     Foundations are vital to any structure that is built. 

1.       On a website called “Dream Civil,” an author discusses nine purposes that are served by a foundation.

2.       If a foundation were not put in place, multiple problems could quickly arise and destroy the structure that was built.

3.       In Psalm 11:3, the inspired penman asks a very important question.

 

If the foundations be destroyed, what can the righteous do?

 

B.      The only secure foundation upon which to build a home today is the Holy Scriptures (Matt. 7:24-25).

 

Therefore whosoever heareth these sayings of mine, and doeth them, I will liken him unto a wise man, which build his house upon a rock:  and the rain descended, and the floods came, and the winds blew, and beat upon that house; and it fell not:  for it was founded upon a rock.

 

1.       The storms of society cannot shake it.

2.       The winds of false doctrines cannot crack its walls.

3.       The rodents of immorality cannot burrow through the foundation.

4.       The flood waters of problems, difficulties, and stress will not topple it.

 

C.     Example:  In the course of a marriage, either partner might get propositioned by a member of the opposite sex.  If their home is founded upon Scriptures, they will appeal to them in those instances (Prov. 5:18, 20).

 

Let thy fountain be blessed:  and rejoice with the wife of thy youth…And why wilt thou, my son, be ravished with a strange woman, and embrace the bosom of a stranger?

 

II.                 AN AUTONOMY OF LEADERSHIP

 

A.     Each home is an autonomous unit. 

 

B.      Each home has the husband/father as the head of the house.

1.       Ephesians 5:23

 

For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church:  and he is the Saviour of the body.

 

2.       In the home, the wife is supposed to submit to her husband (Eph. 5:22, 24), and the children are to obey the commands of their father (Prov. 3:1-2; Eph. 6:1).

 

C.     This autonomous nature of the home is vitally important.

1.       When a child leaves his home, he is no longer under the rules of his mother and father.

2.       The problems, dysfunctions, and sins of one house do not have to impact the homes of others.

3.       The home is a separate institution from government.  God never intended government to raise our children. 

 

D.     NOTE:  If parents desire assistance outside the home, they can seek it, but it is a decision that made at the discretion of the parents.

 

III.              A MISSION OF SALVATION

 

A.     If we were to ask:  “What is the main mission of the church?” all would immediately respond, saying:  “To take the gospel to the world” (Mark 16:15).

 

B.      But, what if we asked:  “What is the main mission of the home?”  We would not be so quick to respond with an answer.

 

C.     Shouldn’t the answer be the same as the one given regarding the mission of the church?  The home should be the place where the gospel is taught and souls are won.

1.       Let’s remind ourselves of the mission of fathers found in Ephesians 6:4.

 

And, ye fathers, provoke not your children to wrath:  but bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord.

 

2.       Children are gifts from God (Psa. 127:3).

 

Lo, children are a heritage of the Lord:  and fruit of the womb is his reward.

 

3.       Parents are the stewards of those little ones they bring into the world.

a.       The children really belong to the Lord.

b.      He wants little children to come to Him (Matt. 19:14).

c.       Parents will give an account of their stewardship (1 Cor. 4:2). 

 

D.     As I thought about this point, three people came to mind.

1.       Abraham (Gen. 18:19a)

 

For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the Lord, to do justice and judgment…

 

2.       Joshua (Josh. 24:15b)

 

…but as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord.

 

3.       Lois and Eunice (2 Tim. 1:5)

When I call to remembrance the unfeign faith that is in thee, which dwelt first in thy grandmother Lois, and they mother Eunice; and I am persuaded that in thee also.

 

IV.              AN INVESTMENT WITH HIGH YEILDS

 

A.     An investment is a product a person puts money into with the hope of profitable returns such as interest, income, or appreciation.

 

B.      Family offers extremely high yields:

1.       Love

2.       Acceptance

3.       Identity

4.       Counsel

5.       Refuge

6.       Assistance

7.       Joy

8.       Respect

9.       Peace

10.   Comfort

11.   Education

12.   Forgiveness

 

C.     NOTE:  Investments only bring high yields if a person puts a lot in.

1.       I invest a little of my money in a savings account at my bank.  It pays interest every quarter.  Perhaps I should say:  “It pays me about a quarter each year.”  If I invested more, I would reap more.

2.       The same is true at home.  There is an old proverb that says:  We reap “what” we have sown.

a.       If the “what” is positive, the return will be positive.

1)      Galatians 6:8

 

For he that soweth to his flesh shall of the flesh reap corruption; but he that soweth to the Spirit shall of the Spirit reap life everlasting.

 

2)      If you sow kindness, you will reap kindness.

b.      If the “what” is abundant, the return will be abundant.

1)      2 Corinthians 9:6

 

But this I say, he which soweth sparingly shall reap also sparingly; and he which soweth bountifully shall reap also bountifully.

 

2)      If you do not invest much love, there will not be much love in return. 

 

V.                 A LEARNING ENVIRONMENT

 

A.     The home ought to be a school in which all can learn (Prov. 22:6).

 

Train up a child in the way he should go:  and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

 

1.       Communication skills, especially listening

2.       Relationships

3.       Social Skills

4.       Problem-solving

5.       Finances

6.       Work ethic

7.       Respect

8.       Compassion

9.       Self-control

10.   Spiritual values:  Bible reading, Bible study, prayer, giving, good works, etc.

 

B.      Learning also means that we are free to make mistakes.

1.       Types of mistakes

a.       Sometimes mistakes are just that, mistakes, of little consequence.

b.      Sometimes mistakes are quite big, of grave consequence.

c.       Sometimes mistakes are sinful actions.

2.       Example:  Peter made mistakes both in words and actions.

3.       Here, the burden is placed upon the person who is doing the training:  patience, compassion, and forgivenss.

 

C.     When mistakes are made, there should also be correction. 

1.       Here, the burden is placed on the person who is being trained.

2.       When sin is involved, the correction involves repentance.

3.       Example:  Peter went out and wept bitterly (Luke 22:62).  He remained an apostle and did wonderful things in the kingdom.

 

VI.              A YEASTY ENDEAVOR

 

A.     Some might believe that we made up the word, “yeasty,” just so it would fit in this outline.  Not so!  The word “yeasty” is a word that carries this meaning:  “marked by change.”

 

B.      The family unit does not remain the same.  It is constantly changing over the years.

1.       A couple

2.       A couple with parents

3.       A couple with babies

4.       A couple with small children

5.       A couple with teens

6.       A couple whose children have grandparents

7.       A couple who loses a child

8.       A couple who parent(s) are also living with them

9.       A couple whose parents are deceased

10.   A couple whose children are no longer at home

11.   An individual who must face the death of a mate

12.   An individual who may be divorced

13.   A family that is now blended

14.   A single parent

 

C.     Several qualities help us to navigate all of the changes in our families.

1.       Faith:  God is bigger than our struggles.

2.       Patience:  We endure knowing that this too shall pass.

3.       Pliability:  In addition to others changing, I, too, must change.

4.       Eager to learn:  I will learn the skills I need and the lessons I am taught.

5.       A tamed tongue:  Hasty words only harm myself and others.

6.       Hope:  Most of the time there is light at the end of the tunnel.

7.       Acceptance:  There may be a period of sorrow and grief, but I accept change and move forward.

 

CONCLUSION

 

A.     In this lesson we have attempted to take a look at family.

1.       F-oundation of Scripture

2.       A-utonomy of the home

3.       M-ission of salvation

4.       I-nvestment with high yields

5.       L-earning environment

6.       Y-easty endeavor

 

B.      God created the family at the outset of the Creation. 

1.       He intended the earthly family to be a type or shadow of something greater that was to come. 

2.       In time, He would bring His spiritual family, the church, into the world (1 Tim. 3:15).

 

But if I tarry long, that thou mayest know how thou oughtest to behave thyself in the house of God, which is the church of the living God, the pillar and ground of the truth.

 

3.       Many of the concepts involved in our physical families are also found in the spiritual family.